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i put pictures on these pages in the hope that they'll inspire me. so far, it's worked out alright..until now. maybe the problem is that i'm so scared of the phone, i'm afraid to write about it. so instead of something about the phone, or talking to people, or whatever... i guess i should analyze myself for once, and maybe i'll figure out what's at the root of this irrational fear.
-the phone ringing makes me jump, and my heart race. i don't like to call people, or answer the phone. i dislike calling because you never know who will answer, and i'm shy of strangers, not to mention easily intimidated at times. i dislike answering because it's rarely for me. usually people who call my house want my parents, and i'm not the biggest fan of adults who still think i'm five. with two of my exes, phone communication was a big part of the relationship. i suppose that could contribute to my fear.. you see, the last two times i talked to people on the phone regularily, it didn't turn out well. maybe somewhere in my subconcious, i'm trying to stay out of trouble. in anycase, i'm one of the most irrational people ever. and there goes the phone. *eep!
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